M. Kastnerová and P. Vášová - How to Handle Uncertainty in Relationships

Psychologie.cz and Kino Přítomnost present another instalment of their psychology lecture series. This October's speakers are psychologist and psychotherapist Martina Kastnerová and crisis interventionist Petra Vášová.

You wait for a message that never comes. You replay a single sentence over and over, searching for meaning that may not be there at all. Relationship uncertainty is one of the most exhausting states a person can experience - often it is not the rejection or breakup itself that hurts, but the limbo between, when we don't know where we stand.

Why does waiting for an answer drain us so much? How does it connect to our attachment style, early experiences, and fear of loss? When is uncertainty a natural part of life, and when does it cost us too much energy?

Uncertainty is not just a matter of the mind - it lives in the body too, as chest tightness, insomnia, or endless rumination. It is the nervous system trying to cope with the loss of a sense of safety. Kastnerová and Vášová therefore offer two perspectives on one theme: alongside psychology and neuroscience, there is space for working with the body - breath, conscious movement, and grounding in awareness as tools to navigate a time when we don't have all the answers.

During the lecture you will learn why the brain often tolerates uncertainty worse than unpleasant certainty, how relationship uncertainty relates to attachment and early experiences, and what happens in the nervous system during waiting, silence, and rejection. The discussion will also cover why we are sometimes drawn to emotionally unavailable partners, how to distinguish intuition from anxiety, and how to avoid getting lost in assumptions and catastrophic scenarios. You will also discover how to use breath, movement, and body work to regulate emotions, and why conscious movement, tai chi, or body work can be an important source of stability during difficult periods.

This lecture is for anyone who has ever stood between hope and fear, between the desire for closeness and the fear of being hurt.